I’ve spent a decade now as a Nutritionist helping women lose weight by changing their relationship with food and rewiring their habits.
Because weight loss is such a massive industry these days it means we’re constantly bombarded with conflicting and confusing information about it from individuals and companies driven solely by their own financial interests.
So, recently I sat down and asked myself a simple question:
Based on my experience of working with hundreds of women on this, “What’s actually TRUE?”
Here’s what I came up with…
1. This is really hard.
2. It’s messy and non-linear and there’s no finish line.
3. Food manufacturers and marketers are not on your side.
4. Your brain chemistry is not on your side.
5. Why you want this matters a lot.
6. In order to stop using food for feelings, you’ll have to actually feel the feelings.
7. You can’t game the system; it’s just going to be hard.
8. You’ll need to become a different person.
9. You might need to make new friends.
10. You’ll benefit enormously from routines, rituals and boundaries.
11. You’ll need to learn to enjoy better food.
12. It’ll be way easier if you learn to enjoy cooking. Yes, you can learn to enjoy cooking.
13. You have to try to move your body every day.
14. You may never get to the exact weight you want to get to.
15. You need to be okay with that.
16. You must relearn how to speak your body’s language.
17. You must learn to trust your body again.
18. In many ways it’ll get harder as you get older. It just will.
19. You can do hard things.
20. There are no magic beans.
21. Bread is a processed food. Yes, all bread.
22. Trauma stays in your body and will affect your ability to lose weight; get the help you need.
23. You might not actually want to lose the weight.
24. You’ll probably always feel like you’re failing at this.
25. Sugar is addictive.
26. You’re probably not eating enough fiber.
27. Being drained and exhausted all the time will make this almost impossible
28. Rest is as important as diet and exercise.
29. Other adults can cook for themselves; you don’t have to do it for them.
30. You doing this will feel threatening to some people.
31. Lots of the time, you won’t want to do this.
32. Your body is freaking miraculous; try to think about that at least once every day.
33. The meaner you are to yourself as you lose the weight, the harder it will be to keep off.
34. You cannot hate your body into changing.
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There’s not one thing on this list I disagree with. But I would like to know the secret to enjoying cooking regularly – once in a while is fine but every day……….
Lol! You’re not alone there Dee! I think the secret to enjoying cooking regularly is to reframe how you think about it. Instead of thinking about it as a chore or something you “should” do or “have” to do, try thinking about it as a beautiful act of self care and self love towards your wonderful body.
I also feel like you need to allow time for cooking. It’s much more enjoyable if you aren’t rushed or trying to do three things at once. Make preparing the meal the main event 😊
I love this list!!!! And, as a personal trainer (since 1997!), I think this list is really important in its wisdom and truth. Thank you, Sara!
Amazing!!! Every single point ✅✅✅ I’m going to print these out and put it on my wall ❤️
Fantastic Megan! I’m glad it hit home! xo
I like “best” the comments about the importance of rest and that the meaner you are to yourself while losing weight, the harder it will be to keep it off! Had not thought of it that way! Thank you!
True x 34. Could relate to each statement…yes, to all.
Love it Terri!
I think the majic key to all of this is loving yourself. I agree with each statement but I think through loving yourself it will be easier to work through each one. We don’t take time to love ourselves we put everyone else first. Just a thought.
Your Honesty Sara, is what attracted me to you, in the first place and you continue to be authentic and caring….I agree with all you have said and am Eternally greatful for your hard work, research and encouragement 💞🙏
Hi Sara
Are these comments your beliefs or are there yes/no answers to them pls?
Sue, these are things that I believe are 100% true based on my experience of working with so many people in this field.
This is so powerful – nearly everyone of these resonates like a metal rod striking a pole. This is hard, and it gets harder as we age: but we change when the alternative is harder.
Exactly Chris! The fact that it’s hard isn’t a reason to stop!
Brilliant, Sara!
Aw, thank you Joyce 🙂
OMG you are exactly correct! I’m turning 59
Soon and have fought this most of
My life. I even dislike Christmas because food is involved. I am an amazing baker. But I’m addicted to it! Then I feel crappy, I gain weight ? What’s to enjoy about all that stress? It involves spending money that’s like calories to me, something I have limited amounts of …. Extra calories= unhappiness/stress…trying to find extra $ =unhappiness/stress merry Christmas! Lol (this just touches on one issue in my struggle to like myself and my bingeing. Heck I’m jealous of people
Who get bariatric surgery?
The holidays can absolutely be such a tricky time with food Patti! Did you watch the free workshop I did earlier this month on my 3 tips for enjoying the holidays without overeating? People really loved it so you might want to check it out: https://youtu.be/oT51aXNTlTA
Thank you for this, it is amazing, simple and so true. Each one hit home with me in some way. Gives me a lot to think about and maybe make some admissions that I never thought I could. Thank you for always keeping me inspired, even on the hardest of days.
Oh you’re so welcome Lori! I’m so happy that this really resonated with you.
Thank you for these truths and reminders!
You are so welcome Renee!! xo
#34 hit me the hardest. I need to accept myself as I am, before I can make any changes
Oh my, Sara, this is all so absolutely spot on!
And I say this as an exhausted, overweight, middle-aged woman currently lying on the sofa eating a surgery snack. I don’t want to eat it. I know it will make me feel awful. But I’m so tired that I haven’t got the energy to resist.
Tomorrow is another day!
This is a very good (and somewhat depressing) list. It was the reality check I needed, though. There is no magic formula, no miracle waiting to happen. There is me, a determination to love myself, and support from others. I’m good with that!! Now, back to actions and activities and changed thinking that support the truth that I’m worth it!
I’m right there with Dee. I want to enjoy cooking. I watch Rachel Ray occasionally and she makes it look so darn fun. I buy all the stuff to make the same recipe and cook it but it never seems to become an enjoyable process. Unless you count stirring Orzo. Oh I love to stand over the stove and stir orzo. I’m kind of fortunate that my husband loves to cook. Although when he gets into a slump, it’s hard to get him to cook the things I need to eat healthy. Then I kind of take over for a while.
Love this list. Every point true and relevant. Especially about this being hard, because it is! And it’s complicated, and messy and things are stacked against you. Even YOU are stacked against you and to succeed you have to become someone else and I don’t know how to do that yet.
Thank you Sara.
Sara, This list hits home for me too! Thankfully, a friend suggested I look you up on YouTube recently, and listening to your videos has been like having a watershed moment. You’ve come along at the right time, and you’re helping me shift so many self-sabotaging behaviors. If I had read this list of 34 first, I may have wanted to throw it at the wall. However, today, I don’t and it’s just another reminder helping me to stay conscious and keep making progress. Thank you so much for your love, sweat, and tears and helping me! 💖